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Jim Coffman, author, tries SHOW not TELL

JONI IS REALLY SAD

        Joni trips on the step as she enters Murdock Funeral Home.   She passes Michael Murdock who flashes her a large plastic smile.   Joni does not respond.
        She sees the layout: the casket with Robert is straight ahead, a cluster of people—presumably the family—stands past the casket, and a line is queued to view the body.   Joni joins the line to wait her turn.   Two people turn toward her.   Their expressions, like Joni’s, are blank.

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